I promise you, blog readers, a post and maybe even a video (?!) about Audrey later this week. But for now, I want to write out my thoughts and "ah ha's" that I received from church last night.
For the last five or so weeks, we've been going through the steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and how it applies to our lives as Christians. Last night's step was Step 4 "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."
When I sit down and think about my struggles and am really honest with myself, I get really upset and frustrated with myself. As many times as I commit to myself, others, and God that I will put effort forth to work on different things, I still fall short. But as I read a post on the church blog, I was reminded that we shouldn't let ourselves be so weighed down with this "inventory list," that we feel helpless or hopeless. Instead, we should focus on hope and the help that God provides through the Holy Spirit, and other Christians.
My friend Lindsy spoke last night at church. She posed the question, think of a stressful time in your life and how did you handled the stress? Did you blame other people? What kinds of things were you saying?
Instantly I thought of my last few weeks at work, and how I've felt overwhelmed and stressed. As much as I may try to have a positive attitude, when I get stressed, I find myself making excuses and blaming others, gossiping, and ending most days feeling anxious, negative, and overwhelmed. Obviously, we all fall short sometimes, but when I stopped and thought about my actions and where my heart is at in these situations, I felt so horrible. But instead of dwelling on the horribleness, I am starting off this week with new found hope and patience.
Proverbs 12: 25 "Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up. "
So my prayer, focus for this week is taken from Psalm 51:10,
"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me... Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."
So off I go, into my week with a willing spirit to serve God and others, to not blame others but to encourage others, and to let go of stress and anxiety.
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2 comments:
I see you wrote that this morning...how did it go today?
Ruthy - Honestly, today was a really busy day with a lot of bumps, but my attitude was better and I left feeling much more peaceful than last week. I shared with my manager about my struggle and what the message was at church, and she helped encourage me today which was great. I feel so much more at peace.
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